MOVING IN WITH YOUR BOYFRIEND BEFORE MARRIAGE...THOUGHTS?!

Well you guys....! The time has finally come. 

I'm getting my very first place with just myself...and my cooler half!

I. AM. STOKED. 

Turns out that we are signing the lease on Valentine's Day (which I thought was super cute...I'm already planning the whole night! Sign the lease, grab some blankets, some wine, some snacks, games and the iPad and have a full blown slumber party in there with no furniture.) Ha! 

Ever since I moved out of my parents house in SD when I was 21 I have lived in LA with two of my best friends from High School. 

We went from The Valley in LA, to the Marina where we stayed for 2 years then back to the Valley where we've been for the past 12 months. 

What's kind of funny though is that my boyfriend (Esteban) and I discussed moving in together LAST time my lease was up.

He was SUPER cute about it. He took me out to dinner with a view (my fav) and pretty much laid it all out and asked if I was ready to move in with him.

Then there's me...miss indecisive. I said yes at dinner and then thought about it for a few more days and decided that I actually DIDN'T feel ready. 

I felt like I was still having a lot of fun living with my roommates and I know he's the one I want to be with so I figured we have a lot of time to live together so I didn't want to rush into it. (I'm SUUUUUUPER slow in relationships).

I'd say it wasn't until the last 6 months that something clicked and I was DYING for us to have our own place.

I FELT READY. 

As I started talking about it to people though I was getting mixed feedback. 

I'd say mostly everyone was really excited for us and already told me what they're getting us as a house warming gift.

But then...there waaas I'd say, a handful of people that we're a little more hesitant. 

They we're either asking me if I was sure I didn't want to wait to be married first or they were telling me their nightmarish stories of back in the dayyyy when they lived with a boyfriend and they broke up and it was the worst break up ever because you still have a leaseee and what do you do with the furniture and blah blah blah. 

Which I totally get BUT. 

What do you guys think?

I feel like for me PERSONALLY, I want to take things slow.

And moving in together is FAR LESS of a commitment than getting married so I feel like it makes sense to do that first. (even though I definitely plan on marrying him ;) )

I want to experience us having our own space together and letting our styles intertwine and just enjoy the journey. 

I'm not really very interested... in fact I'm bored at the thought of doing 'what people usually do" or " doing things in the right order".

I think you should do things in an order that makes sense to you and the person you're choosing to spend your time with. 

So with that said. I'm pretty effing excited. 

If you think about it, this is going to be my FIRST PLACE EVER that I don't have to hoard everything I own into my bedroom.

So obviously I've been SUCH a Pinterest slut lately. 

I'm already planning the house warming party and picturing my mornings at the new place plus getting hard over the fact that Trader Joe's is like 5 minutes away! UGH. WHAT IS LIFE!

I can't wait to bring you guys along on the move and show you the new spot. We're both veryyy laid back, minimalist to an extent (or trying to be) and into some artistic ish so I'm picturing plants, pink walls, comfort and LOTS of blank space. 

EEEEEK. Wish us luck! 

And leave any comments below if you have been or are in a similar situation !

XX

HOW TO HANDLE A BREAK UP - MY 4 BEST TIPS

UGGGGGGGHHHH. 

It's been a while since I've personally been through a break up but I DEFINITELY know how it feels and that it completely blows. 

I've had a few people hit me up recently telling me that they're going through a break up and wanted some advice. 

I think I've seen enough happen and I've seen where people mess up too often after a break up that I kind of just want to talk about it.

First of all, I've never been that girl that's an "on and off" person in a relationship. We're either dating or we're not. I don't see the point in leaving that grey, in between area open to kind of just do whatever you want. 

It kind of just seems like an opportunity to do something wrong and not get in trouble for it.

SO, when I break up with someone, it's DONE. 

PS: I'd love to hear any of your tips or stories so comment below if you have any!

So if you're in a situation where it's DONE, especially if you're the one that got broken up with, then consider some of these "tips?" I guess I would call them... Because none of your friends want to hear you talk about your on and off relationship for 10 years. THEY'RE OVER IT, you need to be over it too. 

1.

DON'T STALK THEM ON SOCIAL MEDIA. 

Always and forever, this will be number one. You are COMPLETELY 100% torturing yourself when you go see what the last thing was that they posted, who they're following since the break up, what their captions say, where their geo-tags are....BLAH, STOP. 

It's also silly to me because it's so easy to block someone but it seems like a lot of people after a break up make a huge effort to stalk their ex on social media ALL DAMN DAY. 

You are not going to get over someone if you are obsessing over their every move and breath. You stay extremely attached to that person and it's just un healthy. I mean, especially if they broke up with you then I think you need to realize that you need to move on. 

Don't torture yourself. 

2.

DO YOU.

OMG. Maybe this should be number 1? It's a close call. If someone breaks up with you, DO NOT SPEND YOUR TIME TRYING TO GET THEIR ATTENTION. This is such a bad move. I feel like I can even see right through posts where people are trying to get back at their ex. 

Don't post a picture of yourself in Europe and talk about how your so happy to be there only because you know your ex REALLLLY wanted to go to Europe. 

Don't even post a picture of you drinking a Caramel late when you hate Starbucks but you know that was your ex's favorite drink. 

Get what I'm saying? Because at the end of the day, THE ONLY REASON you are posting that picture is because you are waiting to see if he or she is going to react to it. So you're still technically using SO much energy throughout your day just to get that persons attention. 

And the worst part? They know what you're doing. I mean they dated you right? They know you. They're going to know if you're being genuine or fake so don't let them have that satisfaction that you're still worried about what they think. 

DO YOU. 

3.

DON'T POST YOURSELF PARTYING 

Okay - for some this might seem totally appropriate which yeah go have some cocktails with your girls and if you want to post a picture of that I think thats okay BUT don't make the caption ANYTHING about him, or her. 

But if you never party, don't purposely go out and get hammered and post pictured of yourself with people you don't know JUST to "get back" at your ex. 

If I saw my ex do that I would laugh. especially if they never liked clubs you know? It would be so obvious that they were still wasting energy just trying to get back at me, which is kind of pathetic. 

If someone breaks up with me, I go off the radar. You won't know where I'm at, what I'm doing, how I'm doing...and at the end of the day, that's going to drive your ex more insane that him being able to see your every move and see that you're still clearly obsessed with them. 

4.

GET BUSY. 

Post break up for me is like crack. I feel like it's the best time to do all the shit you forgot that you wanted to do while you were in a relationship. This is also why you never want to get to this point in a relationship. 

You should be able to be you + MORE in a relationship...not 1/2 of who you are because you were too busy giving yourself to someone else. 

If you're going through a break up then you need to make sure you're busy all day doing things for yourself. This helps keep your mind off of your break up and it helps push your forward. 

Start going to the gym again and get your diet on point. Start hanging out with friends that you haven't made time for in a while. Go work on what YOU want to do. 

People that go through break ups and spend all day doing nothing other than trying to get the attention of their ex end up digging themselves deeper into a hole of depression, and girllllll you don't have time for that. 

I feel like whether you're going through a break up or if you've been single for a while and you feel like you want to start dating, the absolute best thing you can possible do is DO YOU. 

Be yourself, don't play games, and focus on your goals.

Doing you will always be the most attractive thing you can do.

Comment your tips, tricks, and stories below!

Love you guys

xx

PROUDLY CAPPING OFF 2016, AND SETTING GOALS FOR NEXT YEAR

December really seems like it can be a hit or miss right? I think that we all get caught up in the fact that a whole year has gone by (again) and we wonder if we could have gotten more done. 

We're really just moving on from the month of December to the month of January but we don't really look at it like that. I know for me at least, I spend time in December writing down all the things I want to accomplish for the following year. 

When I look back on it I can easily see all the things that I was able to check off vs. all the things I didn't even come close to finishing - which can be kinda depressing right? Do any of you do that?

Being bummed out is pretty much one of my least favorite things. I hate being in a bad mood or upset but sometimes it's hard to avoid, especially when it comes to the progress of myself.

SO! I always try to turn things around by finding the positive which is why this year I decided to take a look back on 2016 and write down everything that I was proud of and what I had accomplished. 

I highly recommend trying this! 

It really showed me where my focus was this year, which helps me figure out what I neglected and allows me to make more of an effort in those areas for the following year.

Some things I'm grateful for in 2016:

• branching off into chelsey rose health
• launching my first physical product
• getting better at my photography
• being more consistent with my blogging
• doing my biggest collaboration so far 
• getting paid for my first fitness video shoot 
• traveling to NY for my first time
• living with esteban
• Working with someone who i've wanted to work with since i moved to LA
• Staying Healthy
• Understanding my direction and getting a better grasp on who I am and how I work
• Doing collaborations with Breville, Perfect Bar, FItMoo, BeFit, Persu, FabFitFun, and more

 I definitely noticed that my focus this year was all about work and growing my brand which I'm very excited about. I knew that that was what I wanted to focus on this year and I'm happy with the progress that I made. I'm so grateful for new people that I've gotten close to and how I've managed to be more consistent.

I'm HUGE on writing down goals and keeping them somewhere where you can see them at all times. People sometimes ask me if I have a journal, or a notebook, or a planner to organize...I literally have all 3 plus two white boards, and keep reminders and notes in my phone.

It is so important to figure out what you want in the long run and then working backwards to figure out what you need to do DAY TO DAY to get to that end goal. If you don't write these things down then you can't be aware of the progress you've made and you might lose direction and motivation. 

I just wrote down my goals for 2017 in the notes on my computer but I plan on transferring them to my white boards at home and I plan on talking to a few people about them. 

Talking to people that support you about what your goals are and what you want to accomplish is SO IMPORTANT. 

When I tell people that I want to do something, they tend to check in on me about them and the progress I've made. They also can be a helping hand because they know what I'm wanting to do so they might meet people that could help me accomplish my goals.

So, to take a step in holding myself accountable, I want to share with you guys some of the things that i want to accomplish/ some things that I'm excited about for the upcoming year!

• Spend more quality time with my family
• Start a podcast
• Create a membership for my readers with exclusive content
• Offer my health guide and fitness guide
• Spend less time at my 9-5 and more time at home doing what I love
• Move in to a place with my boyfriend!
• Take my sisters on a trip
• Start a new hobby
• Meet new fitness goals
• Fix my back
• Start meditating
• Start a serious savings account to buy a house
• Pay of my credit cards
• Take random trips throughout the United States

That's just some of the things that I want to focus on this year but I'm realizing that I want to try to spend more time exploring and spending time with my family this year. 

I also hope to make new leaps in my career and try to back away from being at my normal job as much. 

Now i'll take this list and try to start planning it out. I'll try to plan trips, I'll start seeing what I need to do to start a podcast, how long it takes and what I need to do weekly to make sure that everything runs smoothly. 

I'll write down fitness goals (maybe one for each month?) and I'll start making appointments for physical therapy to get my back straightened out. 

See how this all helps me work towards my goals? Without this list, I would just enter the new year with a few ideas that I would probably only work on casually when I decided to think about it. 

Now I know what I want, and I can have a game plan. This is so important in reaching your goals so I highly recommend that you try it and also try writing down everything your proud of from 2016 rather than being bummed out about what you didn't finish. 

Let me know what some of your goals are below so I can help hold you accountable!

xoxo

Chelsey

CUT THE BULL SH*T

Aggressive?

Don't worry, I don't mean it in a mean way. In fact, I'm kind of writing this as a reminder for myself!

Soooooooo

You know how life is solid, everything's pretty good, you can't complain and then BOOM, fucking out of nowhere you are drowning in life, don't know why you're even on this planet, NO clue WTF you're doing or why you're doing it. 

You see everything as pointless, you're a failure, you should be further along in your career and in your relationship.

You SUCK, right?

Literally it's like one day you say, OH! I'm so happpyyyyy! I'm living with my friends, I'm making as much money as a server as I would If I had a "real" job, I'm single AF and loving iiiiitttt HAAAAY.

Next day:

WHY THE HELL don't I have my own place yet, I HATE living with people, I still work in a restaurant, I'm just gunna serve people for the rest of my life, I never fulfilled what I ACTUALLY wanted to do, I should be at least dating someone at this point.........

Yeah - we've all been there.

Including me, for sure.

All I'm going to say right now is, 

RELAX. RELAX. RELAX. 

Deep breath in...annnnd out. One more timmmme....cool. Now let's talk.

---

1. THE LAW OF ATTRACTION

So maybe you are this person or you've heard this before but ...The person that when something bad happens says, "I KNEW THAT WAS GOING TO HAPPEN!"

Um, what?

Why would you pre meditate something bad happening?? That's just a weird thing to do. 

Well you say because, bad things always happen to you and you just KNEW that something was going to happen.

Again, weird. 

I'm the kind of person where if things don't go well I think, well...NEXT STEP. I don't dwell on it and I sure as hell don't tell everyone that that was what I was EXPECTING.

I'm ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS expecting THE BEST.

The best opportunity, the best parking spot, the best trip, the best tip, whatever.

---

People that are constantly expecting the worst are SERIOUSLY damaging their motivational drive, their perspective, their opportunities and their risk to take chances because no matter what they will ALWAYS seem to have a reason or an excuse as to why it won't work or go well.

I'm currently reading a book right now called, The Secret. I'm curious as to who has heard of it and who hasn't but basically...

SPOILER ALERT

It's about the one, the only, the LAW OF ATTRACTION.

Have you guys heard of this before?

This is how Google defines it:

The LAW OF ATTRACTION is the name given to the maxim "like attracts like" which in New Thought philosophy is used to sum up the idea that by focusing on positive or negative thoughts a person brings positive or negative experiences into their life.

Pretty basic right?

It's basically saying that whatever you expect, you will get...whether you're expecting good things or bad things.

So if you're expecting bad health or expecting your boyfriend or girlfriend to cheat on you or you're expecting your car to break down, or whatever, then it's MORE LIKLEY to happen.

You're brain doesn't necessarily register that that is a bad thing. It just knows that you're thinking of this particular thing happening, so it starts to subconsciously help you achieve that.

Scary right?

Even if you don't know how the hell it could even be possible that something could work, if it is what you want, then YOU NEED to think and believe that it will work.

You will have good health, you will be in a long lasting & loving relationship, you will be a millionaire, you will move to Costa Rica ... Get what I'm saying?

I remember when I first moved to LA my dad asked me to write out my budget.

I lied my freaking face off on that budget and I was scared. I didn't know how the hell or where the fuck I was going to come up with money for rent, food, insurance, my car payment, gas and whatever else but I just KNEW I would make it work. 

It doesn't mean that it was easy and it doesn't mean that there weren't times where I was saying "God, I don't know how this is going to work but, I trust ya!" but it all worked out. And hey, I've never asked my parents for money so HOLLA.

2. WHAT YOU THINK, YOU SEE

An easier example might be this:

You know how when you start dating someone and out of no where you start seeing their car ALL AROUND THE EFFING GLOBE??

It's obviously not your boyfriend or girlfriend that you're seeing driving down the street 9 million times but it's the same make and model of the car they have.

That's because this person is constantly on your mind and now you are more drawn to things that you never would have noticed before.

The same thing happens when we start to visualize ourselves a certain way.

Pretty cool right?

This is why in any success book I've ever read they all say to write down where you see yourself in X amount of years. What are you wearing? What is your morning schedule? What does your house look like? BE SPECIFIC.

When you start to really see yourself somewhere you make it more tangible, Then your brain starts to work on again, subconsciously, figuring out how to obtain those things.

---

So if you feel like things aren't going your way just chill out, stay positive and tell yourself that everything is going to work out. My immediate advice would be to go get this book called THE SECRET by Rhonda Byrne as well as AWAKEN THE GIANT WITHIN by Anthony Robbins.

These books will help you stay positive and help you think about what you really want and help you plan on how to get there.

Keep your head up!

xoxo Chelsey 

BUDGETING LIKE A BOSS

Who else thinks they're at this age where you feel like you should be 400 steps ahead in your career and then realize you had like 3 overdraft fees THIS MONTH.

Doessssn't exactly scream responsible. 

Money is a hard thing to have, ha! When I don't have it, I think of everything I desperately need to buy, like protein powder, and a new computer and how I STILL need to get coolant in my car. 

Then when I do have it, I think of everything that I THINK I need, like a haircut, a new dress because it's 50% off, and to redecorate my whole room with paint, plants and vogue posters from Etsy. 

(Let's just say I HATED accounting and my teacher looked like the bad guy in Spiderman so it was hard to concentrate. He was weirdly distracting, in kind of a scary, creepy way.)

My dad used to get on my ass about this stuff all the time and I remember I used to get so pissed because I would make up excuses like "I'm 17, I barely make any money what do you expect from me?!". 

But he made me realize (after years of trial and error), a couple things. 

1. If you owe someone money, you don't have money to spend. 

- Now when I was younger, like I said, that would drive me nuts! Mainly because I was horrible at it. But seriously, now how annoying is it when your friend says that they don't have any money so you buy them something with the understanding they "they'll pay you back", and then next thing you know "they still don't have money" but they just bought a whole new summer wardrobe.

- Now you're even more screwed than you were before because now you bought more stuff esentially spending money you don't have & you still have to pay your friend back. LOSING. 

2. PRIORITIZE

OMG I used to be the WORRRRRRRSSSSSSSSSSTTTTT AT THIS. I would get money and just BLOW it. Paycheck? Sweet. Say hi and BYE to the new shoes, 85 lunches, and trip to tahoe I'm about to trade you in for. See you again in 2 weeks. 

Like I said, while I didn't have money I would think of everything that I ever wanted. But back then, once I got the money, I would actually go buy all of those things. 

Then when my car would almost explode on the freeway with my 2 younger sisters in the car due to having LITERALLY no oil in it AND I had to call my dad for help (this actually happened), he shows up wanting to actually hit me with his truck and wonder how I managed ONCE AGAIN to not get the $40.00, 3,000 mile, must have, oil change that he always told me to get. 

See? Priorities. 

He told me, "If you're car is filled up with gas, up to date on all it's maintenance, you don't have any outstanding bills, you don't have any debt, you don't owe anybody and money, AND you put some away in savings, THEN, and ONLY then, do you find out if you have money left over for spending money. If the answer is no, then sucks to be you."

Haha, so in other words from ages like 17-23 it pretty much "sucked to be me" because I didn't have jack for spending.

(I'm not sure if that's what he said verbatim but, it makes me laugh to think that he did. Sounds like him ;) )

So, here's how I started to make more money, build up a couple grand in my savings, and get my shit together. 

1. Be Honest With Yourself.

I remember when I really looked at my finances and I was SCARED. Haha like legit felt like I needed some white wine and a xanax before I could begin. I remember opening up my journal and writing down all my monthly bills + what I  ACTUALLY needed for gas and food per month. My total came out to $1, 596. So I realized that the absolute minimum I needed to aim for per month was 2,000 (which is 500 a week). 

My checks at the time were coming out anywhere from $800.00 - $1,100.00 every two weeks so I was barely hangin on there for a while.

2. Grow a Pair And Switch Things Up.

So I decided to start looking for a new job. At the time I was a hostess getting shit for tips and I knew that I needed to be at least serving if I wanted to make more money BUT I was scared to apply anywhere because I didn't have any serving experience, and I'm the WORST lier on the planet. 

I already knew I wouldn't be able to be that person who could lie to all these different companies and say that I had been a server for years so what did I do? 

I started applying to 5 star hotels, bougie lounges and upscale restaurants to be a server. 

A lot of places would tell me that they couldn't hire me as a server but that they would be more than happy to have me work the front. 

NOPE, NEXT.

I started sitting down in interviews telling these people that "I'm fully aware that no where on my resume does it say that I'm a server but the only reason that girl is capable of doing this job is because you guys have taught her how, and not me,"

And to my surprise, three different high end restaurants wanted to hire me as a server, they were willing to give me a chance. Crazy right?! Then boom, I got a job making more than what I needed per month.

3. Know where your money is going, and put it there. 

It's like having a planner, or a schedule for the day. If you write down what you need to do and when it needs to get done, then you make it happen. If you don't, then you wake up everyday without an agenda and feel like you have nothing to do and thennnn, nothing gets done.

What I did first, (since I was now getting all my tips from cash rather than paychecks) was every night that I got home I would take 20% of my cash and put it in a paper clip with a piece of paper that said SAVINGS.

Then I would take half of what was left and put it in the clip that said BILLS.

Then whatever was left over would be mine to spend. Which was like 5-20 dollars haha. BUT if I didn't do this, say I just got home and was too tired and kept the money in my wallet, then I would go out for a few coffee's, make some stops at Marshalls, buy way too many things at Trader Joes and then next thing you know, that money is lonnnnng gone.

Once I had a good size stack of money in the BILLS clip, I would start to section it off even further by clipping together money and writing PHONE BILL, CAR PAYMENT + INSURANCE, etc. 

Then I would realize how much money I had for rent. If I'm stable then cool! This doesn't mean that I get to take some extra money out of there for spending. This means that I have some bills for next month ready to be taken care of. 

If I was lacking on money for rent, then that means that that 5-20 dollars in spending money at the end of the night, unfortunately needs to go towards my bills. 

Make sense?

Any comments or suggestions? Leave them below!